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Well I dropped the weight, and my physical is on Friday. It feels weird knowing all of this is happening. 4 months ago I thought I had everything figured out. Finish school and spend the rest of my life with my girlfriend. But I was dumb and I forgot about the school. I screwed up and I ended up losing her because of it. Now I’m on my way to becoming a Marine and it won’t be easy.

The dreams are getting more vivid. I can’t handle this pain every time waking up from them. I miss you so much it’s hard to admit. I try to think positive but it doesn’t work. I don’t know what to do about it anymore at this point. I don’t think it will ever go away.

Looks like I’ll be shipping out in either September or October. If I ship out in September I’ll be home for Christmas and maybe my birthday. Let’s hope it works out. I’m still getting over everything but it still kinda sucks. I just have moments everyday where I can’t stop thinking about you and I just end up staying sad. Oh well, nothing I can do but let time run by.

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